O'Malley Family Rhea Eulogy

O'MALLEY FAMILY Baltimore, Maryland

Eulogy for Rhea Wright
September 6, 2006

Written by her son, Stewart

My Mom was a remarkably resilient and courageous woman.

She possessed a toughness that was exemplified by many of her generation. They deal with life's challenges and its inevitable sorrows and setbacks with dignity and grace and never think to burden others with their complaints.

And if there ever was someone who had a right to complain, but NEVER did, it was my Mom! It was a testament to her strength of character that was evident in her until the end.

She was born during the Depression in 1933 and was the youngest of nine children. She lost both of her parents before she was five (father Edward-pneumonia; Louise Stroke 8 mos. later). Her oldest brother, Eddie O'Malley, barely 20 years old and with the help of the older siblings and Louise's brother, Uncle Carl, kept the family together. This heroic act and commitment to family had an impact on my Mom that lasted her lifetime.

Like many back in the middle of the last century, my Mom bypassed the opportunity of going to college, married early and started her family immediately. She had five children before she turned 30.

By 35 she was left alone with five children to support. Keeping her family together became her top priority. With no college degree to fall back on, she had to start out at the bottom and became a secretary at PHH (an Administrative Asst. in today's vernacular). Even in the late 60's a secretary's salary wouldn't stretch nearly far enough to support a family with 5 kids. Determined to keep the family intact, my mom did what came naturally to her, she didn't bemoan her fate; she went out and got a second job, working weekend nights waitressing at the Bratwurst House in Towson. She often wouldn't get home until the wee hours of the morning.

And when extra $$ were needed, she would work Thursday nights, again getting home late and then waking early to get us ready for school and herself off to her 'day job'.

After several years of this routine, which was anything but routine, she used her considerable talents and skills, to begin her rise up the corporate ladder at PHH. She eventually became a supervisor of a team of fleet managers.

Additionally, our father re-entered the picture and Rhea's financial burdens began to ease somewhat. But another cruel twist of fate awaited her. She was stricken with Multiple Sclerosis (MS), an insidious disease that often times cripples and kills its victims. Well, it met more than its match in my Mom. She battled it and the accompanying physical setbacks with all the courage and dignity that you came to just expect from Rhea.

Again, never complaining and getting back to the job of supporting her family. She was to suffer more 'setbacks' including a heart attack and quadruple bypass surgery about seven years ago. Nothing worth complaining about to my Mom! In fact, it wasn't until I was in the hospital early on the morning of her stroke that I was even aware of the fact that she had been diagnosed with emphysema and had been suffering its effects for the last two years!

Why BURDEN your family with that?!!

Well, in spite of everything that was thrown her way, my Mom still loved life and always kept her sense of humor. She was a spirited woman with a highly competitive streak and loved being in the company of her family. And we were blessed with a big Irish-Catholic family! I think we at one time had 39 cousins! Summer vacations in OC were awesome. Never lacking for players for softball etc…

Rhea especially enjoyed having the family over during the holidays. Holidays at Rhea's often meant staying up until well after midnight and playing games that would test your intelligence, wit and most importantly your vocabulary. Naturally, her favorite was Password. If you dared to compete you had better bring your "A" game and if you wanted to win, you had better find your way on to Rhea's team! And if you were unfortunate enough to commit a gaffe in the middle of the contest, you could rest assured that you would never be allowed to forget it! All in good fun, of course!

Rhea absolutely adored her grandchildren, Megan, Erin, Kristen, Harrison and Willie and the adoration was mutual.

The kids loved going to Grandmom's and it was an extra special treat if they got to spend the night at 'Camp Rhea's' and swim with her in the pool, stay up late playing games on the computer etc.

Grandmom loved exercising her 'grandparent's prerogative' and not adhering to suggested bedtimes, often letting the kids stay up late to watch movies and play games with her.

Payback seems a better word than prerogative.

On the way home from one of the many trips to Camp, my kids reveled in the fact that 'Grandmom is the boss of you!'

Rhea was always 'young at heart' and later in life she embraced the computer age and would spend hours online exploring the Net and then pepper us with humorous emails and other things that were of interest to her, including O'Malleys online. Com! She was especially fond of the 'you know you're old when…I think it gave her a kick to let us know that with each passing year we were more her contemporary than the younger crowd.

She also enjoyed the joke genre that started out, 'why men are….fill in your own description. I guess we can forgive her that!

My Mom would demonstrate her often times feisty demeanor and sense of humor even under the most trying of circumstances. At the onset of her stroke, a week ago on Sunday, the paramedics came and were going about the business of gathering her medical history they asked a bunch of questions, including her age. My brother Danny told them she was 73. Rhea, at this time unable to speak wouldn't stand for this, throwing up her hand with two fingers extended signifying that she indeed was only 72!

Throughout this final ordeal for my mom, I have learned a few things and had a few others re-affirmed for me.

I learned that even in tragedy some good things do in fact happen. Last night seeing so many people come to pay their respects was inspiring to me.

I learned that my brothers and sisters were imbued with some of my Mom's toughness and remained strong for her until the end. We came together as a family to support and comfort the woman we so loved and respected.

This re-affirmed for me the importance of FAMILY and what it means to be a part of one.

I love you all and I love you Mom. I know you are off to a better place. May God bless you and may you rest in peace.